The Ice-Cream Truck

[CRNDLSM]

I don't think seasons matter for words really, put us in season.

Perhaps the season has long since past for this poem to be relevant, but I think it shows a bit of promise. With a bit of revision and tinkering, it should turn out just fine. Also, I haven't been to the forum for a while, so I am a bit rusty.

How I love to hear the song
Of the passing ice-cream truck-
Vending all its frozen treats
In the sweltered summer muck.starting off like a nursery rhyme

It seems to echo languidly
Through our quiet little street.
The drowsiness would melt us all,these 3 lines make it a little more sophisticated echo languidly, but the last line is all cheese.
Before we had our treat!

But now some different songs begin
And our little street surround,
As the youth of our fair neighborhood,I had to reread this for youth to be the down beat, too many syllables for reading
Cry and shriek and sound.cries and shrieks are sounds?

O! How I love to hear the children,
with crumpled bills in hand,
Of this joyous vendor-
Their sweets they quick demand.quickly? Awkward stanza

And as they come about their prey,the vendor or the creamscent are the prey?
Their laughs- they fill the air!
And fill our quiet neighborhood
With a child’s thoughts and cares.

So every day of every June,
In the swelter of the afternoon,
We dance and sing the merry tune
Of the passing ice-cream truck.some Rhymes are perfect, some are odd, some it seems you just couldn't decide where to put them.  

As far as a nursery rhyme song goes this is pretty good, you can say just as much with less but I couldn't tell you where to make cuts.  Good luck!