Kelly

[Mark Cecil]

A strong topic to talk about which is clear throughout with some interesting imagery as well. I like "Now I am coming down from space, with a weapon," gives a picture of a person with real intent. The random rhyming works well in places e.g. "Now I'm on the sofa, with the mota, passing television..." But other times you might want to consider e.g. the third stanza. I feel it adds humour to the poem if you were going for black humour fair enough, if not consider changing it but I won't go as far as to say it makes your poem frivolous it just depends what you want to do with it.