09-11-2016, 07:48 AM
i like how the title seems too cheesy, because in your poem justice is not JUST an egg. just some of the wording i think could be rearranged
quote='dukealien' pid='211361' dateline='1464559607']
Justice is an Egg
Justice is an egg whose rooster is
white outrage, red revenge,
black vendetta when avengers meet avengers meet, clash?
heeled, spurred, bloody-eyed
drive-by cockfighting
over insults that define them over self-defining insults that happen to be crimes?
but happen to be crimes.
Justice is an egg whose hen-fowl is
acceptance, resignation that complies
but briefly tames the cocksure savage,
yields to force majeure,
pecks listlessly
sharp jots and tittles of the law
but in the end nests, brooding.
Justice is an egg, infertile if
its hen does not conceive
or if its rooster’s outrage fails,
witnesses hide, terrorized, lose hope.
Detectives facing surly anti-snitching anti-snitching, i cant think of another way to say it, just doesnt feel right for some reason
shrug and lose their hard resolve,
cannot sell the concept of impartial
but implacable redress by law.
Justice is an egg whose hatchling is
trust - confidence bereaved and victimized
will have their day, and witnesses their say their. . . hatchlings? confidences?
in safety. Shedding shells of lawyers,
bureaucrats, officials, policies -
offspring of compliance offsprings plural?
and revenge, trust wobbles
but it grows.
and at the end justice seems to be the process, shroedingers box, not the rooster, the hatchling, the hen, the shell, but the 'maybe' of the result . . .
super clever poem, i hope you get it perfect
After reading Ghettoside: A True Story of Murder in America (Jil Leovy).
[/quote]
quote='dukealien' pid='211361' dateline='1464559607']
Justice is an Egg
Justice is an egg whose rooster is
white outrage, red revenge,
black vendetta when avengers meet avengers meet, clash?
heeled, spurred, bloody-eyed
drive-by cockfighting
over insults that define them over self-defining insults that happen to be crimes?
but happen to be crimes.
Justice is an egg whose hen-fowl is
acceptance, resignation that complies
but briefly tames the cocksure savage,
yields to force majeure,
pecks listlessly
sharp jots and tittles of the law
but in the end nests, brooding.
Justice is an egg, infertile if
its hen does not conceive
or if its rooster’s outrage fails,
witnesses hide, terrorized, lose hope.
Detectives facing surly anti-snitching anti-snitching, i cant think of another way to say it, just doesnt feel right for some reason
shrug and lose their hard resolve,
cannot sell the concept of impartial
but implacable redress by law.
Justice is an egg whose hatchling is
trust - confidence bereaved and victimized
will have their day, and witnesses their say their. . . hatchlings? confidences?
in safety. Shedding shells of lawyers,
bureaucrats, officials, policies -
offspring of compliance offsprings plural?
and revenge, trust wobbles
but it grows.
and at the end justice seems to be the process, shroedingers box, not the rooster, the hatchling, the hen, the shell, but the 'maybe' of the result . . .
super clever poem, i hope you get it perfect
After reading Ghettoside: A True Story of Murder in America (Jil Leovy).
Peanut butter honey banana sandwiches