Thyroid: Revision

[LunaDeLore]

Yeah sort of cliche ridden.

This line

"I take a telepathic head count" makes no sense. Telepathy is communication between minds. Maybe telekinetic would be more of a fit.

Plus it seems a bit overblown. I have pretty bad thyroid problems along with with worse things. I'm all for hyperbole, but this seems to push things a bit far.  Actually this seems much more energetic than someone with fatigue would tend to write.    


Best,

dale

Dale,

Telepathic head count is used in the context of one human being's light energy, projected from the eye, connecting with another's light energy. So when someone would want to make sure everyone's accounted for, the afternoon- after, they'd project their light energy on a thought to make a connection. Sound's crazy, doesn't it?

Thanks for reading and commenting,

Luna