04-17-2016, 08:07 PM
A volume beckoned me to pry
its body open. I obliged,
and secrets slipped inside. My mind
devoured every pulsing line,
and brilliance sparked where words aligned. - I really love this line
Complete, I matched each gap to spine.
Not knowing where my friend belonged,
I laid it maybe somewhere wrong,
then gathered up my borrowed fund, - Not very clear on what "fund" the narrator's referring to. I mean I do get that the narrator is in some kind of a library however... I don't how "fund" fits in there.
absconding soon as I was done.
I actually think your poem is wonderful as is, barring the "fund", I think it relays the experience of intimacy that is shared between a reader and a book. A kind of an affair, to which no one else is admitted but the reader. The way you have composed these lines made me feel like as though for just a moment, I got to be a witness and party to that very intimacy. I actually also happen to like the flowery language, it goes well for me only because you have utilized it in such a concise fashion.
its body open. I obliged,
and secrets slipped inside. My mind
devoured every pulsing line,
and brilliance sparked where words aligned. - I really love this line
Complete, I matched each gap to spine.
Not knowing where my friend belonged,
I laid it maybe somewhere wrong,
then gathered up my borrowed fund, - Not very clear on what "fund" the narrator's referring to. I mean I do get that the narrator is in some kind of a library however... I don't how "fund" fits in there.
absconding soon as I was done.
I actually think your poem is wonderful as is, barring the "fund", I think it relays the experience of intimacy that is shared between a reader and a book. A kind of an affair, to which no one else is admitted but the reader. The way you have composed these lines made me feel like as though for just a moment, I got to be a witness and party to that very intimacy. I actually also happen to like the flowery language, it goes well for me only because you have utilized it in such a concise fashion.