Love me do

[Leanne]

I've written you a poem,
my poem's really funny,
I know you'll love my poem,
now give me lots of money.

I thought I'd find a picture
of some blonde chick with boobies
and scribble down some rhyming
while sucking on some doobies.

I know you're not too clever
so each line's a cliche
I'll write the same tomorrow
and then one every day.

Of course I want to workshop
it means I get attention
I'll argue almost every point
that you have dared to mention.

I took up poetry one day
at my dear mother's urging
she told me it would get me laid
-- so far I'm still a virgin.

I've been at this ten years or so
and I don't need your scorn --
when times are tough, my mum and me
will go and watch more porn.