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Pensive Glance
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01-29-2016, 07:36 AM
As the poem stands it has a solid sentiment, and one that's easy to relate to, but there needs to be some freshness iced on top of the lines maybe a metaphor or simile to take the reader to a deeper place. I hope that makes sense and is of some help. Best Keith
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out |
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| Messages In This Thread |
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Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-28-2016, 11:44 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by LukeSizemore - 01-28-2016, 11:54 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by ellajam - 01-29-2016, 03:03 AM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Keith - 01-29-2016, 07:36 AM
RE: Pensive Glance - by RiverNotch - 01-29-2016, 03:14 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-29-2016, 09:04 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by ellajam - 01-29-2016, 09:16 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-29-2016, 09:46 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by ellajam - 01-29-2016, 10:03 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-30-2016, 01:01 AM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-30-2016, 11:29 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by ellajam - 01-31-2016, 12:11 AM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Jeremiahcp - 01-31-2016, 01:57 AM
RE: Pensive Glance - by RiverNotch - 01-31-2016, 03:18 AM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-31-2016, 07:12 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by billy - 01-31-2016, 08:02 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by Julius - 01-31-2016, 10:56 PM
RE: Pensive Glance - by ellajam - 01-31-2016, 11:20 PM
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