01-10-2016, 04:51 AM
I would like to see the fact you are talking about karma indicated by some image or action (which could still be in the title); as it is now the title kind of steals that journey for the reader.
I like to write short poems as well, and the brevity can be very challenging. I consider titles for such a short poem tricky. If a title is too heavy handed, then it becomes a device the writer uses to circumvent brevity, by directly telling the reader what is happening (show don't tell, even for titles). In short poems brevity is the key: leaving a taste, a single impression, or invoking a focused thought. I think titling a short poem is much more involved than titling a standard length poem, and sometimes brevity works better without a title at all.
I also think in short poetry it is so much more tempting to break the rule, show don’t tell, as there is such limited space. I know I find that to be the greatest challenge of short poems.
I like to write short poems as well, and the brevity can be very challenging. I consider titles for such a short poem tricky. If a title is too heavy handed, then it becomes a device the writer uses to circumvent brevity, by directly telling the reader what is happening (show don't tell, even for titles). In short poems brevity is the key: leaving a taste, a single impression, or invoking a focused thought. I think titling a short poem is much more involved than titling a standard length poem, and sometimes brevity works better without a title at all.
I also think in short poetry it is so much more tempting to break the rule, show don’t tell, as there is such limited space. I know I find that to be the greatest challenge of short poems.