12-14-2015, 04:32 PM
Sometimes when the leaves turn,
the air cools, the sun fades,
summer's storm surrenders to shivered drizzle... i prefer shivered drizzle here; the s's somehow bond the line together, but not in an overbearing way
Sometimes I feel. strong having this separated from s1. really gave that feeling of rare or reluctant emotion when you're outside your safe space. i feel that way quite often.
Three drinks in and feeling numb
somewhere lost between happy-- or maybe just dumb. between happy and what? or is the thought cut off by --? either way, this line is a little confusing.
The radio offers more emotion than I can take; interesting, i feel the complete opposite. perhaps the feeling of irony is the emotion you're talking about.
sometimes tomorrow really is too long. i like that this line didn't rhyme like the previous - the "numb" feeling is being projected nicely
Sometime we'll feel the urge to live buried deep below the urge to hide.
Some times.
the air cools, the sun fades,
summer's storm surrenders to shivered drizzle... i prefer shivered drizzle here; the s's somehow bond the line together, but not in an overbearing way
Sometimes I feel. strong having this separated from s1. really gave that feeling of rare or reluctant emotion when you're outside your safe space. i feel that way quite often.
Three drinks in and feeling numb
somewhere lost between happy-- or maybe just dumb. between happy and what? or is the thought cut off by --? either way, this line is a little confusing.
The radio offers more emotion than I can take; interesting, i feel the complete opposite. perhaps the feeling of irony is the emotion you're talking about.
sometimes tomorrow really is too long. i like that this line didn't rhyme like the previous - the "numb" feeling is being projected nicely
Sometime we'll feel the urge to live buried deep below the urge to hide.
Some times.