Rum (and) Cola

[billy]

Rum-ranked puke
tells fresh tales
of anguish.

In the wake,
we neglect
the fly-swarmed muck

for the weight
of daylight.

it works for me, though the second stanza leaves me a litte confused jd.

is the fly swarmed much, the vomit?

also, i'm not sure what we're in the wake of?

is it the vomit, or the anguish?
having read it a few times i think it needs to let the reader into it a bit more.

you say anguish....for me i want to know what the anguish is. a death, a lot love, an illness, debt etc etc. jmo.

thanks for the read. i don't think it would take much to flesh it out a little