Numb

[billy]

it's like a train of thought poem where you just right what's in your mind.

usually they're best cleaned up a bit. i think the first line is cliche but it's made worthwhile by the second line.

the ending works for me, the poems does read as a piece of fluff yet not in too bad a way.  the footer sort of spoils for me, there's not to unravel no insights to see, why not just call the poem spur or spur of the moment or something else instead of a complete erasing with a footnote, i dare say other will like the footnote but for me it kills the poem and the moment of it.

My head is full of cotton.
Not light and fluffy, with blue sky shining through,
or clumped and stained red, from the labor it took to harvest
(Jesus that image sucks).  is this line needed? if you think it sucks the reader may well ask why post it knowing it sucks?

No. no what, it didn't suck,
It is…

What?

Wet maybe? Gray and drab and
smelling of wet sheep. i like the image of the couplet though i think grey and drab is a bit cliche and could be better stated.

What does wet cotton smell like?

Maybe my head is full of wool.
There are no hidden pieces of wisdom or poetic…whatever.
I just woke up,
and I am tired.

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I am just trying to describe what I am feeling right now, so that is probably why this is quite possibly the least poetic poem ever written. This is what it feels like to be so under it all, so depressed, that you can't even think.