06-15-2015, 04:40 AM
Thanks! Yep, I kind of thought "this is the price I pay" might be cliche, now I'm sure.
A question, when you said "how did I miss the lacy thong on the floor, the dirty handprints adorning the door" felt out of place, did you mean the length of the rhyme didn't fit with the rhythm, or that it's just too rhyme-y? I don't really understand.. I'm going to work on this one, (including punctuation) post a revision within the next few days. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!
A question, when you said "how did I miss the lacy thong on the floor, the dirty handprints adorning the door" felt out of place, did you mean the length of the rhyme didn't fit with the rhythm, or that it's just too rhyme-y? I don't really understand.. I'm going to work on this one, (including punctuation) post a revision within the next few days. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!
I relish writing bad poems, if it means someday I'll write a good one.