Supernova

[buildthestars]

(From my first NaPM experience -- thanks for the whole thing)

Supernova

Today, my navel outshines me,
for today, it is a dying star
huffing its desperate last breath. There's something I'm not liking about this intro stanza. Repetitive with "today" and the breaks seem inappropriate.

The immense pressure of gravity's hands
ever-squeezing its fiery core
at last compounds its every facet
into a heavy hole in time.

Its shell of gas and light erupts You used "its" in the stanza above and I think you should drop it here because it interrupts the flow.
into a splendid rainbow of dust,
of carbon and oxygen and iron and nitrogen,
of water and earth and wind and flame,
of all the material elements. Not so good repetition above, gorgeous repetition here. Love it.

And this great cloud of stardust scatters
beyond the world of my humble body,
beyond the womb of mother earth,
beyond the weirs across the heavens, Love these three lines together.
to create a brilliant legacy for its father
by filling the gaps in the puzzle of life. I don't know how I feel about this last line. I would smooth it out.

Really wasn't sure how I felt about this when it started, but I absolutely loved it by the end. I think you just need to work on the beginning bit and give it the type of punch that you have in the last two stanzas. Good job.