Tunnel Vision

[Wjames]

The subway is haunted by eyes with no aim,
there’s nowhere to lay them inside this steel cage,
our phones get no signal, now poised with a riddle:
who dies in the middle of this mayday charade.
 
The tunnel is dreary, its train car’s the same,
a panhandler whistles, but no one has change,
a young girl gets nervous, the man hides his shame:
the subway is haunted, by eyes with no aim.

I absolutely love the second stanza. Just have to say that. I changed what I did solely for some sort of different spin on it. The third line distracted me with the cell phone reference... Though I understand what you were saying, the lead-in to the second part of line fits questionably.

Thanks for reading, yes the second stanza's definitely the meat of this poem. I tried to write this one with a recurring meter, which makes editing much more difficult. I think I might just cut the first stanza altogether...