Junku
#5
(03-17-2015, 03:24 AM)Tiger the Lion Wrote:  
(03-17-2015, 02:00 AM)ambrosial revelation Wrote:  preparing three lines
his first fix of the morning -
a slave to haiku
Haha. Love it. I would suggest that 3 lines in the morning is a manageable habit. Avoid longer forms that inevitably lead to rehab!
Paul 
Yeah, you're right Paul. We must think of those Sonnet fiends who need 14 lines just to get started.

Cheers,

Mark

(03-17-2015, 08:06 AM)just mercedes Wrote:  Great drugku! I understand the addiction.
Likewise...
Also I think you've come up with a better term with 'Drugku', I obviously wasn't thinking with my 'jun-ku', it sense make don't.
Thanks,

Mark

(03-17-2015, 10:34 AM)billy Wrote:  no need for [a] on the last line or his on the 2nd.

i like the fun or the thing.
Thanks Billy,
I agree with you about the words that should be dropped and I usually would of but I wanted it to be 5-7-5 to emphasize the attention to detail of the misguided addict, although I appreciate that it is difficult to get that across in the poem. Perhaps if I had put the amount of syllables in each line at the end in brackets???

Thanks for reading,

Mark
feedback award wae aye man ye radgie
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Messages In This Thread
Junku - by Magpie - 03-17-2015, 02:00 AM
RE: Junku - by Tiger the Lion - 03-17-2015, 03:24 AM
RE: Junku - by Magpie - 03-17-2015, 09:17 PM
RE: Junku - by just mercedes - 03-17-2015, 08:06 AM
RE: Junku - by billy - 03-17-2015, 10:34 AM
RE: Junku - by ellajam - 03-17-2015, 11:20 PM
RE: Junku - by Magpie - 03-19-2015, 01:52 PM
RE: Junku - by ellajam - 03-19-2015, 02:42 PM
RE: Junku - by rayheinrich - 03-19-2015, 05:32 PM
RE: Junku - by ellajam - 03-19-2015, 08:16 PM
RE: Junku - by justlikeyou - 10-06-2015, 08:40 AM
RE: Junku - by rayheinrich - 10-06-2015, 08:41 PM
RE: Junku - by justlikeyou - 10-06-2015, 10:06 PM
RE: Junku - by rayheinrich - 10-07-2015, 06:31 PM
RE: Junku - by ellajam - 10-06-2015, 09:13 PM
RE: Junku - by RiverNotch - 10-08-2015, 04:42 AM



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