< homeland >

[rayheinrich]

I enjoyed this too. Line 5 a bit confused - kiss the islands? the islands went fishing? ...

Oops, yes. This is your fault for not reading my confused mind.
The information was all there, I just forgot to put it on the
paper.

Have corrected it, thanks for pointing it out.
From: "would kiss them as they fished"
To: "would kiss her as she fished"

... I agree with the comment about 'and'.

See below.

Really enjoyed this one Ray. My only issue is the occurrences of the word "and". I'm not sure how intentional it was, but I think you could omit or replace some of them even without the use of commas. (I like that you forgo punctuation in the piece, so that's not the route I mean).
Thanks for sharing,
Paul

It was intentional, I've been doing things like that using 'a', 'or',
'the', 'but', etc. for years. You'll find it in many of my poems.
I like the rhythm the repetition lends and I like the enjambment
and I think it more resembles the way people actually talk:

Where are you going today?

"Library grocery store hardware store"

"To the Library and then the grocery store and then the hardware store."

The problem, of course, is many people don't like it; it's a bit jarring
and it interrupts their reading of the poem.

It's a choice I made years ago and it was probably wrong but
at least it's my wrong.  

*Example:

From the first half of my poem  < the paper wasps > :

       
                                                   the paper wasps
                                                   build their nest out      
                                                   from the white boards under
                                                   the eaves of our house

                                                   right above the kitchen door
   
                                                   and i see them each day      
                                                   and every day      
                                                           as i walk the dog  
                                                           as i take out the trash      
                                                           as i let out the cats      
                                                           as i let in the cats    
                                                           as i let out the cats
                                                   and my neighbors    
                                                   and friends      
                                                   and the people who would sell me god
                                                   and all the rest of life that passes through
                                                     
                                                   they've never stung us

                                                                etc. ...