01-03-2015, 01:19 AM
milo,
" but the poem isn't actually about shoes, it is about the dead"
I can see that is where you want to go with this, but considering your title I think you tie in the shoes as an equal part to the dead.
"because the dead don't wear shoes" this happens, or this is so.
The whole premiss is based on that statement and each stanza answers that statement, or at least that is how I read it going in because of the title, if you see what I mean.
Sorry I wrote this before I read your new version, as I didn't realize there was one until I read one of your comments. The new version seem more in line with your title.
Dale
" but the poem isn't actually about shoes, it is about the dead"
I can see that is where you want to go with this, but considering your title I think you tie in the shoes as an equal part to the dead.
"because the dead don't wear shoes" this happens, or this is so.
The whole premiss is based on that statement and each stanza answers that statement, or at least that is how I read it going in because of the title, if you see what I mean.
Sorry I wrote this before I read your new version, as I didn't realize there was one until I read one of your comments. The new version seem more in line with your title.
Dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.