12-23-2014, 09:39 PM
pancakes in the stream. this is what we are, and we rerly on each other.....you minded me of a song
love the ice cake image created, the last line gives me an impression of the onset of Alzheimer's. the melting works for me as it extends the ice metaphor. the one nit i have with the content is [seared] while it juxtaposes the ice them as a lost memory it feels a bit like it's intruding where it shouldn't
love the ice cake image created, the last line gives me an impression of the onset of Alzheimer's. the melting works for me as it extends the ice metaphor. the one nit i have with the content is [seared] while it juxtaposes the ice them as a lost memory it feels a bit like it's intruding where it shouldn't
(12-21-2014, 02:02 AM)Erthona Wrote: Pancakes in the Stream
Pancake ice is nice,
so round just like your moon pie face no need for just
my dear. I know the image is there
so clear. It seems it’s been misplaced
or seared. My mind is melting away.
–Erthona
Ice Pancakes
©2014