Poles
#11
(11-04-2014, 12:07 PM)Tiger the Lion Wrote:  Poles
Sorry about the state of the igloo;
it's been a polar bear of a day
and I am cold.
 
I've managed to scrape
blubber to burn through the night 
if we can find a spark.
I enjoyed the whimsical tone in this piece. The images it conjured in my mind were fresh, so thanks for that. The last stanza was really inviting.
The only issue I have is with L6. I just think it could possibly be shortened or reworded to make it more... I dunno, savory? At any rate, I liked it.

Azure
cliche my forte
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Messages In This Thread
Poles - by Tiger the Lion - 11-04-2014, 12:07 PM
RE: Poles - by Requiem - 11-05-2014, 09:11 AM
RE: Poles - by Tiger the Lion - 11-05-2014, 12:28 PM
RE: Poles - by SimikPK - 11-05-2014, 06:16 PM
RE: Poles - by Tiger the Lion - 11-06-2014, 04:51 AM
RE: Poles - by SimikPK - 11-06-2014, 05:09 AM
RE: Poles - by spacecoaster - 11-06-2014, 05:51 AM
RE: Poles - by Tiger the Lion - 11-06-2014, 10:53 AM
RE: Poles - by donbouquet - 11-11-2014, 08:38 AM
RE: Poles - by justcloudy - 11-11-2014, 09:39 AM
RE: Poles - by azure - 11-15-2014, 01:31 PM
RE: Poles - by billy - 11-15-2014, 06:12 PM



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