Tired

[just mercedes]

My eyes had grown autumn
from staring too long into the brown leaves of your wearing
out. I said, Go ahead and die

or leave me if you have it in you;
I don't think you have enough left.
And you wouldn't. I get stuck with this 'wouldn't' because it seems to refer back to 'go ahead and die' as well as 'I don't think you have enough left'.

So I spent the night waiting
while you took our time elsewhere, Period or semi colon here?
my eyes were stung and smoky and when you came back,

through a trail of dry tears over the wet curve
of fumes and chemicals to find me,
again arched

in the position between you and myself, I love that! It makes me see the Goddess Nut. http://www.fromcairo.com/images/papyrus_nut_goddess.jpg
you didn't smile, you couldn't sigh or whimper,
you didn't care.

Go ahead, you said, you're alive,
you're the one that can leave. who can leave?
Love died a long time ago.


It would be something like that then. But I don't know if I can get away with it, it leaps over the problem. 

I like it without stanza 6. which for me moved away from the mood.