The Fires of Two

[spacecoaster]

I loved your poem. I enjoyed the flow of the stanzas mind the few aforementioned parts. I enjoyed the surprising imaginary along with the more common imaginary. Together they made a clear picture for me. Although I loved the what you did with the fire theme it is a bit over done comparing the act of making love to a fire.


in The Fires of two

Two fires drawing near
a tender kiss behind the ear
melting into grasping feel
fuel the fires growing dear
which now embrace exotic rhymes
roaring flames that intertwine
effortless and sublime
one in space and one in time

smiles, laughing wiles
unwanted limits defiled
then, i would unzip your trousers
and in your groin plant fragrant flowers I like how you take the naughty(to me anyways) bits like "unzip..." &
blossoms of wet honey "groin" and surround them with sweeter images like "flowers" & "honey"
full of fire, passions and desires
by whimsy, wanting your power

I remember that shower
deep within and wet,
no man made barriers set
we rode the ferris wheel One of my favorite parts
you behind me on the carousel
heavenly fire we did steal,

The fires of two
consumed together
endure then
reluctant surrender
as slight the dying embers
on the cold stone floor I feel it should say "on A cold stone floor"

the temporal of such we find
and that with tears
we leave behind
although sublime
a moment of that open door
is now but dust
on a cold stone floor