09-13-2014, 08:57 PM
the 5/4 metric lines seems fine, though i'm not sure about a couple of them (meter isn't something i've mastered)
not sure about this line:
but it didn't hinder the read.
and;
like, “What would have been the view from the top?”
and
with answers that haunt you for life
there's not a lot of depth to the poem and it has a lot of imponderables but for me that's okay because i think the poem is alluding to that big imponderable....meter.
as an exercise which i'm assuming it is, it's almost excellent.
not sure about this line:
but it didn't hinder the read.
and;
like, “What would have been the view from the top?”
and
with answers that haunt you for life
there's not a lot of depth to the poem and it has a lot of imponderables but for me that's okay because i think the poem is alluding to that big imponderable....meter.
as an exercise which i'm assuming it is, it's almost excellent.