08-06-2014, 11:37 AM
(08-06-2014, 10:33 AM)crow Wrote: Haiku on a Giant Baby Destroying Life As We Know Ita good senryu. i like the way you broke up intergalactic.
Yonder interga-
lactic baby thirsts for milk,
and he'll have his Way.
i think a lower case for both 'yonder' and 'way'.
removing the 'and' in the last line would make it more effective. but i guess you have used it to meet the 5-7-5 requirement.

