Hallelujah

[tectak]

i would love to believe
find you crossing my path
stand by my side when i'm alone
walk with me on my journey
follow me down this long road

when i see sunset i see only sky
in nature i see only miles to walk
a swinging cross on a windscreen
bible unread in a hotel room
preacher shouting in the street

now the days are long
the night fades into daylight
my body is strong
the soul is weak
lost in every place i visit

was there a time i did believe
when i was a kid in the street
schooldays and morning mass
religious education class
i listened and wondered

time has passed
life's journey as set me aside
ive cried and wished so hard
that you were really there I like the word here to replace there
I often sing quietly to hallelujah
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There's not much I can add about the punctuation, Are you referring to Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen? I listen to it often, and like many of the covers done by various artists, Miljenko Matijevik being my favorite.
Believe and street were both used twice with the end of a line, I feel like something different should have been used, probably just me.
The poem reminds me of a persons struggle to believe in God and shows that there is still faith,..imo I do like it

Please read previous posts and reserve contemporary crit for the living. Out of respect for escorial this crit will stand but please do not expect a credited edit any time soon.
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