Empire
#2
Hi - there's a lot in your poem! I'll come back soon and have a closer look, but on a quick read-through two things stood out for me - there's a tense change present/past/present, and also some confusion for me between they/his.
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Messages In This Thread
Empire - by kliS - 07-15-2014, 06:28 AM
RE: Empire - by just mercedes - 07-15-2014, 07:10 AM
RE: Empire - by Tiger the Lion - 07-15-2014, 07:24 AM
RE: Empire - by gernseeker - 07-16-2014, 12:09 AM
RE: Empire - by kliS - 07-19-2014, 02:41 AM
RE: Empire - by ellajam - 07-19-2014, 05:01 AM
RE: Empire - by crow - 07-22-2014, 09:48 AM



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