Tectonics

[ChristopherSea]

This reminds me of a Simon Armitage poem, "You're Beautiful", about a beautiful woman who doesn't eat meat, is lucky and sunny and everything nice, and an ugly bloke (the narrator) who eats meat, gets drunk etc. I've not heard of this poetic form before. I normally dislike "shape" poetry, but what I've seen here is interesting. You make the visual aesthetic work through your contrasting characterisations, which are peopled with sharp, funny phrasing. Thank you for the read

Thanks Jack, I am glad this was effective for you. I will check out that Armitage poem. The first concrete poem that I ever read was 'Bomb' by Gregory Corso. It was a rather huge and ugly mushroom cloud, but a classic beat poem. I like concrete poetry when you can pull it off. I posted a cat one on this site entitled Feline. Currently, I am working on one shaped like a violin about belly dancing as a gift for my wife. Cheers/Chris

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final


                                Tectonics


Their continents obliquely drifted apart                 He stuck with

as she opted for the vegan lifestyle,           proven indulgences,

absurd yoga positions and other       like bacon cheese burgers

whims of new age abstinence.   weightlifting and vintage porn.

 


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Dale/Marcella edit 1 Thank you




                                Tectonics


Their continents obliquely drifted apart                 He stuck with

as she opted for the vegan lifestyle,           proven indulgences,

absurd yoga positions and other       like bacon cheese burgers

whims of new age abstinence.   weightlifting and vintage porn.

 



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                                                    Tec         tonics


Their continents obliquely drifted apart               He stuck to

as she strived for a life of veganism,       proven indulgences,

absurd yoga positions and other     like bacon cheese burgers

fads of new age abstinence.     weightlifting and vintage porn.

 

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Hi, this innovative form is such a treat, I think the form is devastating combined with the subject and the wording right on. Enjoyable and instructive. Loretta

Well, thank you very much for stopping by to read this one and sharing your impressions Loretta. I have another concrete poem on site entitled Feline: http://www.pigpenpoetry.com/showthread.php?tid=12505 Cheers/Chris