Dear My Love, lazy edit

[tectak]

Dear My Love,

I wrote these words to fill a hole within your soul; Lack of clarity in the first line makes the second line impossible to reconcile. Who is so alone? What words? What is a hole in a soul unless you are alluding to "I come to kiss your snatch and fill your hole with soap"...sorry, I meant " I come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope"
so alone now if truth be told.
Today it always seems your caress is so cold - Just today? No. Then don't say it. Omit today...and the dash. You use it incorrectly.
careful now you've just slept,
slightly scary now i havn't wept, Why "i"? Oh, a typo? Correct before posting. It is tedious correcting this kind of error. Now, now is just too present tense for the rest of the piece.Haven't
we always said it would last forever, Yes, hasn't everyone? A mammoth cliche
frighting how slightly things seem to sever. Frighting? Not that correct spelling would save this line. What on earth does it mean? Answers on a postcard, please.
See your eyes are pale and grey,
gravely it seems you've slipped away. No. You have lost the plot. These words, this construct, punctuation and intention indicate to this reader that you are adrift. You must get back on course.
Awkward to see you limb by limb,
loosely i remember removing them. Great line made better by the mundanity of what has gone before. You have, though, still got an inferiority complex.
Though you'll fit nicely im quite sure, I'm. We don't get paid for this, you know
shivering in my deep freezer's door, Forced and simplistic rhyme. Again, you are rushing it. I would go as far as to say you are falling to the end. How do you "get" in a door? Errors of intent weaken the read and make it seem as if you just don't care. Period at this sentence end, after door.
do not knock is all i implore, I
or finger by finger ill settle the score. ill (sic) old pun

Far too many careless catastrophes. Not enough attention to detail. You had an idea. You thought it a good idea. You wrote about your good idea. You wrote badly about your good idea. You still think it is a good idea and so it does not matter that you sprinkle in typos and cluster-fuck with words. It DOES matter if it matters to you.
Best,
tectak