05-12-2014, 11:23 PM
quote='SuicidalBlueJay' pid='164431' dateline='1399860872']
cheerio then!
[/quote]
Suicidal, no one is remotely interested in your declared pristine state with which you prefix almost all of "critiques". Please comment ON THE POEM. The writer wants to hear your views on the work, and not interested in starting a creche for the cringeworthy. Your opinion, regardless of how you may feel about yourself, matters. ANYONE can comment on rhythm, word use or the success or otherwise that poets attain in expressing themselves. Try it.
(05-04-2014, 03:48 AM)poe Wrote: I don't feel that I existHmmm. I'm new to poetry so I'm hesitant to be harsh on poems. I like your poem because I can relate to the pain of existence. At least I get that sort of vibe from your poem.
I feel like the slipped disc of a
solar eclipse
But because the darkness groans like someone left too long alone,
I feel the painful sting
which means, alas,
that I persist
cheerio then![/quote]
Suicidal, no one is remotely interested in your declared pristine state with which you prefix almost all of "critiques". Please comment ON THE POEM. The writer wants to hear your views on the work, and not interested in starting a creche for the cringeworthy. Your opinion, regardless of how you may feel about yourself, matters. ANYONE can comment on rhythm, word use or the success or otherwise that poets attain in expressing themselves. Try it.