04-10-2014, 01:05 PM
Preach it Mungo Man, well said. It is hell running from hell all our lives led by the ones pushing the hell out of us with the fear of hell waiting on us when we get there. Or something like that, I think.
Anyway, The ending to this marvelous enlightenment summed it in the bull's eye.
My feedback, in the form of a question: Why do you (and I've seen it in other poems) split a whole sentence between lines? As in the last line of the last stanza,
"I believe they died
the same way they lived."
I Hope it's OK to learn by giving feedback.
Anyway, The ending to this marvelous enlightenment summed it in the bull's eye.
My feedback, in the form of a question: Why do you (and I've seen it in other poems) split a whole sentence between lines? As in the last line of the last stanza,
"I believe they died
the same way they lived."
I Hope it's OK to learn by giving feedback.