03-24-2014, 12:29 AM
Ellajam. Whew! Thank you for your comments.I was using shearing as in "directional" but yes I can see it needs defining better.
"A swallowed scream cries" I was trying to convey a scream underwater. That yes it is somewhat cut off by its medium.
Eyes now colder, - eyes read orca, which will drag a seal down by its tail flippers to drown it and avoid its sharp teeth.
Punctuation and capitals, I need more work and sort out my editor which is a pain as it auto caps each line. I will re edit in another day or so, again Thanks
