Contend You Not

[jeremyyoung]

Thanks Jeremy,

It certainly reads more clearly, unfortunately it is no longer in iambic pentameter, and as this is a sonnet...

But that is exactly the problem I've been having with this also, I think I have an answer, then realize it is no longer in the correct meter, or I've blown the end rhyme.

Thanks for the input, I amy be able to use some of it as I reformulate.

Dale

My apologies if my edit went too far.

I understand your desire to follow the rules. but your use of language is so muscular that providing the rhyming patter is there, I think you might get away with it - it certainly has a Shakespearean ring - and I understand if you respond you are not trying to wing it.

Have you tried saying it out loud as you are writing it? And if so have you tried using an accent? As often the rhythm will fall into place by not using Standard English.