Pallbearer

[ChristopherSea]

Pallbearer
for Quemilla Anderson


Carrying you
down the church
steps to pealing bells
to the car, I thought myself
a father, taking a daughter to bed
over his shoulder, turning off the light
and shutting the door, waiting to share
a sunlit breakfast at a loud and crowded table.

It's a potent concrete poem Geoff; I dig the church stairs. I don't think you need 'to the car', as the bell chiming alone may be better. I would delete the 'and' in the last line as well. I realize that these words help build the stairs, so you may need to fill in with something else.

I am not certain if this is actually the deceased's father or not. If he is, wouldn't something like: 'I felt myself a father again...' be more poignant (perhaps even if it isn't his daughter).

I hope there are some thoughts for you next edit herein. Cheers/Chris