triolet

[visualcondyle]

"I met the reason of my heart"

I met the reason of my heart.
His lips alone undressed my soul.
We crawl through hands and so it starts,
I met the reason of my heart.
Complacence drinks our sacred art
as two make one and now we're whole.
I met the reason of my heart.
His lips alone undressed my soul.

"I met the reason of my heart"

I met the reason of my heart. (-)
His lips alone undressed my soul. (-)
We crawl through hands and so it starts,(see my comment)
I met the reason of my heart. (good refrain)
Complacence drinks our sacred art (—) (em-dash here)
as two make one and now we're whole. (,)
I met the reason of my heart. (,)
His lips alone undressed my soul.

Hey there,

Great rhythm throughout the poem— the style is very reminiscent of
Frost combined with a strong sense of lyric. I appreciate the controlled yet revealing
nature of the speaker; the narration from the speaker appears somewhat reflective, creating a tone that is both giddy and quite serious. The speaker makes an announcement
in such a small bottle if you will, and I think it suits the content well. I added some grammatical changes in your poem for flow and continuation. The punctuation you have here could work as well, but I think commas and dashes would give it some flavor.

Thank you for posting
VisualCondyle (Tara)