Lying in my room

[billy]

Hi Humbert

are all the words needed. try to make it less of you telling a story show us a few things as well
not a bad effort, it seems like a lot but i doubt an edit would take too long. there's a decent poem here waiting for your love

thanks for the read

Posters fill the olive suede-textured walls,
and books that I like occupy wooden shelves.
My favorite music plays right beside my ear,
and I am quick to take its advice. what advice, this line feels like you know what it means, but it leaves the reader thinking wtf, a suggestion would be to give it some context
My closet overflows with my very own look; a suggestion would be [the] to start the line and [personality] instead of [very own look] add what type of personality, crazy, sexy, prissy etc
I’ve worked so hard to make it mine.
Works of art (my favorites!) do you mean [faovorite works of art]? we know they're yours you told us with the closet line and study desk lines, let the reader assume
are pinned to a cork-board that hangs
above my study desk.
Upon my dresser, my accomplishments change one of the my's
boast my merit and define my pride. for me, this is the end line. it sort of sums up what the poem is all about
I don’t fucking know me. for me, this line isn't needed. we're okay on the site with expletives but for some reason it doesn't ring as real.