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Three A.M.
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01-19-2014, 08:31 PM
Very well done. In my opinion though it is too short. You seem to be recalling a significant, and very specific time. I think if you could expand on it, mainly on the 8th line after evening and before the clocks. I think it could give it even more depth.
That being said, it is your story to tell and you told it very well. |
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| Messages In This Thread |
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Three A.M. - by 71degrees - 12-29-2013, 12:27 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by Farkas - 12-29-2013, 01:15 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by ellajam - 12-29-2013, 01:27 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by ThePinsir - 12-29-2013, 09:59 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by 71degrees - 12-30-2013, 08:09 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by The Blind Daemon - 01-19-2014, 08:31 PM
RE: Three A.M. - by 71degrees - 01-21-2014, 09:04 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by DonMar - 01-19-2014, 09:00 PM
RE: Three A.M. - by justcloudy - 01-20-2014, 08:25 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by Veil of Trash - 01-21-2014, 02:50 PM
RE: Three A.M. - by 71degrees - 01-22-2014, 08:30 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by billy - 01-21-2014, 04:18 PM
RE: Three A.M. - by justcloudy - 01-22-2014, 09:26 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by ellajam - 01-22-2014, 09:58 AM
RE: Three A.M. - by Erthona - 01-22-2014, 10:02 AM
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