01-16-2014, 05:04 AM
I can understand what you are trying to do with this poem. It is nice as a novelty poem. I am finding it a little hard to keep up with the imagery but I think it is a good piece of work.
(01-16-2014, 01:38 AM)Ryan_w_r Wrote: Mind never resting, relentless unease attesting.
empty shells muddling through the streets, attention arresting.
An Incomprehensible sight, mind digesting.
Unable to understand, self detesting.
Alone in this place, no one accepting.
Mind never resting, relentless unease attesting.