01-11-2014, 12:39 PM
I'm a novice. I read it as sort of tumbling fluidly and occasionally stopping in one place where the rhythm repeated, before tumbling again. I didn't go through all of emphasis.l I only looked at a couple of lines and they matched the rhythm that I had read the words in.
My novice eyes see nothing wrong and I am commenting on it because it captured my attention. The type of meter irregularities that I see as a problem are, when most of the poem has coherent sections of the same rhythm, but one line sticks out suddenly, for no apparent reason other than to fit the words. Or, when an unusual use of syllables is required before a rhyming word that would hint at where the emphasis goes.
Oh, also. I'm not sure how to describe it. But, words that have a non-fluid rhythm but have a poetic quality are different than when the words are prose in oddly small sentences. (This one is fluid, as I read it, so not one of these two descriptions).
Did I mention that I am a novice? I'm a novice.
My novice eyes see nothing wrong and I am commenting on it because it captured my attention. The type of meter irregularities that I see as a problem are, when most of the poem has coherent sections of the same rhythm, but one line sticks out suddenly, for no apparent reason other than to fit the words. Or, when an unusual use of syllables is required before a rhyming word that would hint at where the emphasis goes.
Oh, also. I'm not sure how to describe it. But, words that have a non-fluid rhythm but have a poetic quality are different than when the words are prose in oddly small sentences. (This one is fluid, as I read it, so not one of these two descriptions).
Did I mention that I am a novice? I'm a novice.