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Water Jar
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12-07-2013, 01:49 AM
I really really like this except for the last 3 lines. The punctuation threw me off. There seems to be no reason for it and the whole thing loses its flow. Breaking up sentences or verses with punctuation can have a dramatic effect but I didn't see how it works here. Otherwise I like it and it reminded me of being in the woods with my dad chopping and chainsawing wood.
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| Messages In This Thread |
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Water Jar - by brokenprism - 12-06-2013, 03:39 PM
RE: Water Jar - by nuclearwastemisshap - 12-07-2013, 01:49 AM
RE: Water Jar - by No1wouldriotforless - 12-07-2013, 09:23 AM
RE: Water Jar - by ellajam - 12-07-2013, 10:11 AM
RE: Water Jar - by HalfOpenArms - 12-07-2013, 02:43 PM
RE: Water Jar - by crow - 12-07-2013, 05:14 PM
RE: Water Jar - by trueenigma - 12-16-2013, 10:51 AM
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