Needles (*content*)

[litterati]

N00b here. Really enjoyed your poem, here is a little feedback, for what it's worth.

I lie here
dick-length from your perfect warmth
and it stings, knowing what I'll do to you. Great line, I like the "it stings" but maybe "knowing what's in store for you" or "what I have in store for you"?

The tar-thick scent of decay
already writhes between us Love this. I always like "aroma" over "scent" but that is just me.

and it's only a matter of time
before my needles fuck through
your beautiful skin
like a thousand
bloated
pricks
desperate to spray your insides
with all my dirt and revulsion. Maybe "with dank dirt"? The "all" feels unnecessary here. Love the feel of it though.

I press my face hard against
the matted fuzz on your chest
knowing that I need to let you go

I cannot even look at you
without feeling tumorous.