The Day the Birds Died

[Todd]

Hi, I appreciate your use of the prompt. I think for me what I'd like to see here is more mystery. This spells it out a little too much without allowing us to experience it. There's no drama or tension.

Go more for the moment, and less for the reporting and you'll probably have a direction that will have more impact.

Just some thoughts.

Best,

Todd

It was a day in late October
when all of them went
south for the winter,
but then they were spent.
The birds died that day,
but nobody knew
until the plants we need
became so few.

The animals that eat plants
no longer were prey,
because birds that ate them
all went away.
Insects of all kinds
began to thrive,
because they didn't
need to hide.

Less grass in the fields
and the trees are all gone.
Photosynthesis can't happen
each new dawn.
Our oxygen dwindles,
we pay a great cost.
The birds have died,
now all hope is lost.