You Are
#6
(07-31-2013, 10:45 PM)TheWall0912 Wrote:  a raunchy, sordid sense of humor
a piercing laugh heard for a mile
a scar from a childhood rumor
a crooked smile
a too tight bear hug
a different style
a large kissing bug
a need to protect
a prescription drug

my love, a side effect
perfectly imperfect
Hi,
I'm normally not much for list like poems, but I think this one's got something. You have some good lines, my favorites being the two ending lines and L3. L6 felt a bit out of place, I felt it didn't add much. Perhaps you could word it to give the reader something a little more specific. JMHO of course.
-LB


Messages In This Thread
You Are - by TheWall0912 - 07-31-2013, 10:45 PM
RE: You Are - by rowens - 07-31-2013, 10:58 PM
RE: You Are - by jdguyb - 08-01-2013, 01:22 AM
RE: You Are - by TheWall0912 - 08-01-2013, 02:14 AM
RE: You Are - by newsclippings - 08-01-2013, 02:25 AM
RE: You Are - by Volaticus - 08-01-2013, 01:06 PM
RE: You Are - by whatispoetry? - 08-01-2013, 04:48 PM



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