I Smell Your Drunken Conscience (Working Title) EDIT 1

[heslopian]

"Conscious", in your title's context, should be "consciousness", I think. As it is it sounds to my ears like an adjective with no noun following it.

Your welcomed kiss upon my lips
tastes much like bourbon, I suppose.
It's wet and sloppy, your tongue slips. "Wet and sloppy" is the soul of this verse. It conveys everything about this kiss perfectly.

The scent is stained on all your clothes, I might have changed "stained" to "a stain".
filthy and vulgar, much like her, Who?
and slowly ambushes my nose.

You speak to me and your words slur,
"You're beautiful." Ha, I'm flattered.
Your drunken lies, I must concur. This line needs a "with" before "your" to make grammatical sense.

Our love is in pieces, scattered.
My fragile heart is made of glass,
it lies here broken and shattered. Elegant and effective conveyance of heartbreak, I think.

Like a sitting duck on its ass,
your conscience speaks some guilty words
and stumbles around without class. "Ass" and "class" are rhymed really well here.

Cheater taking seconds and thirds,
a secret not kept with the birds. Nicely subtle play on the phrase "a little bird told me".

More detail about your characters and their situation is needed, I think, but overall I enjoyed this poem. Critique is JMHO. Thank you for the read