Remembrance Day - Please give honest critique, aspiring Poet!
#4
(07-21-2013, 04:54 PM)marmake94 Wrote:  Remember those who fought in the trench
English, American, German and French
Gave their life's for their country and others
Feeling sorry for their lovers.

As the poppy's grow, the soldiers die
The rats take nibbles as they lie
Each soldier sent a postcard
But after a while they got bard
The government wrote them out themselves
It was like the soldier where in prison cells.
I agree the rhyming is off. last line "where" is wrong word. "lifes" should be "lives". Few things to fix. Welcome
I once told this blond chick to screw in a light bulb..

She got naked and asked "how do I get in it?"
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RE: Remembrance Day - Please give honest critique, aspiring Poet! - by R.C. KITCHENS - 07-22-2013, 02:57 PM



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