07-04-2013, 07:56 PM
(07-04-2013, 07:26 PM)fim Wrote: Uh-oh,There is nothing wrong with saying it, but it just reinforces the fact that you probably belong in the novice section of the forum. Poetry is not a /message/ that resonates with people, that is religion and philosophy.
I should just keep my mouth shut and things would be better. That might sum up the story of my life.
At the risk of 1) perturbing the monitor (and I suspect but don't know, owner of this site) and 2) violating the "Poems for Serious Critique" critiquing guidelines, I feel compelled to express the (poetically untrained) opinion (if an "opinion" can be "untrained") that there is something in your "offering" that resonates in a place in me that only poetry touches. I would strongly encourage you to listen to the poetry experts that guide you in this segment of this poetry forum because (I strongly believe) your words contain ideas, feelings, ... components of human essence (if you will) that can encourage, focus, maybe even guide fellow travelers on our little journey called life.
Keep writing ... and singing. Your words are Aloe for some of our souls.
Poets are wordsmiths. Poets are master craftsmen of words. They say the same old boring things in new and interesting way. This poem is like a birdhouse made by your niece. Yes, it can be cute and house birds. A poet makes a beautiful, intrinsic marble aviary using less words. It also houses birds, but it is a lasting work of art.
If you had read much poetry and, better yet, if you had critiqued more poetry, you would be bored out of your mind by this.