the intro isn't too bad, it makes the poem feel as though it's about something real (to which only the poet knows the answer) the dual language of the poem doesn't really work well for me though i know it will for some. a little wordy in places but it carries a great voice for the most part. the use of italics in certain parts of the poem would make it pop. (stand out) the Gilgamesh line threw me a curve ball 
the train of though is almost seamless and you move from carriage to carriage with ease, like i said, just an odd and or i that could be removed without losing any of the poems power. though the poem start with a great loss, it feels to me that it's more a statement of lifestyle. that that's just the way it was. I enjoyed the read/ride
the train of though is almost seamless and you move from carriage to carriage with ease, like i said, just an odd and or i that could be removed without losing any of the poems power. though the poem start with a great loss, it feels to me that it's more a statement of lifestyle. that that's just the way it was. I enjoyed the read/ride