05-16-2013, 04:25 AM
Last time I read this I decided not to say anything about it. You might not have put much in the first part of it, but that doesn't matter since that all gets emptied out at the end. Near the end, it turns in on itself, and begins to eat itself. It might sound simplistic, and you might have simply been simplistic when you were writing it. But even the sing-song bla bla rhymes and typical things work for it if you read it with a certain tone. If you don't read it with that tone, it doesn't work well. And it's more of a flavor than a tone that I read it with. And that flavor works even better than the tone. And that might sound like it's saying a lot; but that's not saying much.