05-14-2013, 03:58 AM
I think that your slight edit, is a definite improvement 
The images are sharp and clear.
I had to read the first one a few times, because the 'petrol lawnmower' threw me a bit. But after a few reads, I think it is a very refreshing haiku, I like the surprise in the last line.
Also, I like the ambiguity (is that the right word? I aimed for that is has different interpretations) of the second one.
I think they are all excellent.
Thanks for the read
-LB
The images are sharp and clear.I had to read the first one a few times, because the 'petrol lawnmower' threw me a bit. But after a few reads, I think it is a very refreshing haiku, I like the surprise in the last line.
Also, I like the ambiguity (is that the right word? I aimed for that is has different interpretations) of the second one.
I think they are all excellent.
Thanks for the read
-LB