05-09-2013, 12:37 PM
i places it's very good and in some places, not as much. i like the personification of the redwoods.
some of the poem could be cut away to let the redwood shine. look out for repetition; white wall/ white cloud etc.
use white space to pick out certain parts.
like the 4th line
all in all i enjoyed the poem, thanks for the read.
some of the poem could be cut away to let the redwood shine. look out for repetition; white wall/ white cloud etc.
use white space to pick out certain parts.
like the 4th line
all in all i enjoyed the poem, thanks for the read.