Poetry and Seduction

[Truerenigma]

We were children, short on life. We knew you well, we heard you name.Good oppening, it allows the reader to relate to the characters.
D’Annunzio! D’Annunzio! We called out like the geese disturbed; and then the soldiers came. I like this, now we know the name, and get an idea as to what this is about.
We ran to papa, climbed the steps, in white soap-scented gowns, we leaned The enjambments/line breaks of this line (and the following line) feel forced, and the rhymes are swallowed up, unless I break rhythm when reading out loud (pausing mid-thought to emphazise for rhyme).
out from our ballatoio of black-cracked iron … to see you leave. We seemed
to sense the air turn thick; the clamour from the crowds fell still. A fusillade!
The clatter threw us back into our shuttered rooms… and there we stayed.

We heard the cheers yet hid beneath the pillows of our beds. I like this good image, it's easy to relate to, hiding your head under the pillow to muffle the noise outside.
D’Annunzio, d’ Annunzio! What crimes you carried high that day; the Heads here I can pause, heads can go so many different ways, are heads gonna roll? Might these crimes be executions?
of State were turned away. Then they looked, through eyes of goats, and saw a slit of war. Slit? Goats? Maybe eyes half closed, like slits, but I don't know how goats hold their eyes, so I don't know if it works both ways.
Our papa stumbled to your side; the stairs were leapt, the call to arms, a roar. the "call to arms", although cliche, works here I think, but is it really the ony/best option?
Fiume sucked away our breath, while he your crimson chariot chased; Now you KNOW I love the word choice to start this line. Was that a typo, or fancy word for fumes? Brilliant. But I don't know about "while he your crimson chariot".
heaped with flowers, people say, more like a hearse, but for its haste.

The straggled cortege clustered close to “touch the greatness”, mama said.
What good, we thought, had come from this, our father gone, as good as dead? I think "fathers" plural would be stronger, the cries of the people, rather than just person(s).
We thought we heard the church bells chime and knew we’d lost you to Cockaigne.
That night we hugged, how mama cried, we never saw papa again.
that is, if you could integrate it here. Trust me, if you could accomplish this, it could be very powerful...
D’Annunzio, d’Annunzio! We shed our tears to purge your lie!
Forgiveness waned with learning years;
though words you gave the world in rhyme,
rose high above our infant fears.
I lived in anger, cursed your time,
I curse your name…now I can die.
"..We lived in anger, cursed your time,
I curse your name..now I can die."

Tectak
2013

Well structured in its form and progression. I like it.
Yes, I know Fiume is not a typo, or a fancy word for fumes.

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I would like to add though, that I don't really understand the title. I feel like I'm missing something, but I have a small idea (of what it may mean) that interests me.. Would it be possible to get you to explain it to me?

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