Poetry, My Ole Friend

[Leanne]

Let's just look at the lines Amy mentioned, because there are a few problems with them. First and foremost, I think it's important to note that even though free verse doesn't adhere to any set structure, meter or rhyme, it should still be rhythmic in some way. Poetry (except some very specific kinds, like concrete poems) should always take sound into consideration as it is usually read aloud at some point. This stanza in particular lacks rhythm. It is jerky and difficult to read as it lacks what is commonly referred to as "flow" (I won't bore you with the technical terms ). Part of that is your changes from adjective to noun form and back again when you're describing emotional states -- it needs to be one or the other. My suggestion would be nouns as they sound better -- and with a little bit of tweaking to the words, this is what I had in mind:

Regardless of emotions:
Acrimony, animosity,
Bliss or exultation,
Sorrow or affliction,
Apprehension or distress,
Desire or affection,
Poetry, to the end!

"bitter end" is a terrible cliche, I'm afraid, and even with an exclamation point showing that it's a little bit tongue-in-cheek it falls flat. I changed "love" to "desire" for the sake of meter, and also because "love" is such a vague term. You could also use "in love", as that's a little bit more specific.

What's on the top of your mind might be -- and often is -- good to get down in a first draft, but after that the poem needs to be pruned to bring out its true shape. At some point, we all need to do what I call "killing the babies" -- no matter how attached you are to certain words and phrases, sometimes they're really just in the way.